Gopnik Has It Exactly Right

The New Yorker has an interesting article by columnist Adam Gopnik, about the difference between "the information contained within a recipe" and "how to cook."  Anyone who has tried learning to cook by following recipes, a project inevitably met with frustration and ultimately a tuna sandwich for dinner instead, can't help but agree.

That gulf between the recipe's instructions and how to make a successful version of the recipe, is absolutely stunning, and never acknowledged.  I come to cooking as someone with no prior skill or experience.  I was raised by a single working mother who was taking night courses at the local college towards her MBA.  Half the time, I microwaved a Lean Cuisine for my dinner.  The other half of the time, my mother microwaved a Lean Cuisine for my dinner.

"The recipe is to spend your life cooking," Gopnik says, and if it's hyperbolic to recommend you spend your ENTIRE life cooking, I can verify that the more you cook stuff, the better you will get at it.  There is a kind of transitive property to cooking, even if it's only due to finally nailing down the vagaries of your own stove.

"Cookbook as memoir" is what the publishers are doing in order to survive a world where every recipe you could possibly want is available online with just a bit of Googling.  In fact it seems that the cooking industry is finally crashing headlong into the internet crisis, as has every other industry before it.  I hear a lot of people blaming food blogs like this one for the death of Gourmet magazine.  Is that fair?  It's hard to say.  

If you catch me in an uncharitable moment, I will say that it's not that people aren't willing to pay for a magazine (they're practically free if you sign up for a subscription these days).  It's just that magazines don't give people what they want, but food blogs do.  We want a profusion of beautiful pictures, some instruction on what and how to cook, and a dash of that most modern of writing styles, "first person confessional."

Along the way, Gopnik frames the simplicity trend as a counter-revolution to molecular gastronomy, which I talked about earlier.  And goes after our contemporary passion for salt, blaming it on a desire to be more like professional chefs (who salt things far more than any reasonable home cook ever would).  I personally think that salt is just the latest fad, like pesto before it, and quiche before that.  

(Although as with pesto and quiche, there is some truth to the hype.  I recently had a salt emergency, and had to use a bit of Morton's table salt.  Which I keep around for cleaning and other household uses.  Not having actually tasted "regular" salt for years, it didn't taste like salt to me - it tasted like salty chemicals.  Just awful.)

I had difficulty with his framing device: a man and a woman lie in bed, reading.  The man is reading a cookbook.  The woman is reading a fashion magazine.  Several times throughout the article he acknowledges the existence of female cooks, although these are the at-home dialect cooks; Grandma, who always made a pound cake "like cement."  Considering the whopping gender disparity between cooking at home for the family (primarily done by women) and professional chefs (almost entirely men), this gender specific illustration hits a sour note.

Molecular Gastronomy And You

I have been reading a lot about the Alinea cookbook on the various food blogs lately, and talk of the cookbook has led me to consider molecular gastronomy a little bit more than I ordinarily would have.  I ordinarily would have brushed the entire thing off as a goofy fad at best! 

But reading otherwise sane food bloggers like David Lebovitz tackle some of the Alinea recipes has led me to the grudging belief that molecular gastronomy is both fascinating and worthwhile, if not the kind of thing that is going to replace, you know… "cooking."  Of "food."  That a person might "eat."

I enjoy molecular gastronomy at the very least because it leads to some really funny blog posts.  Call it the sadist in me, but when I read that Lebovitz is now the proud owner of a five gallon SAMPLE SIZE bucket of maltodextrin powder, I could not stop giggling.

Speaking of which, molecular gastronomy could handily be described as "the exact opposite of Michael Pollan."  If Pollan believes that you should not eat anything your grandmother wouldn't recognize, then molecular gastronomy is right out.  Heck, *I* don't even recognize this stuff.  This is after all a branch of the culinary arts in which regular people like you and me end up purchasing and using maltodextrin powder.  

It seems that one of the primary goals of molecular gastronomy is to put interesting and delicious flavors inside forms that are not technically the kind of thing you would consider "edible."  Foams are popular, for example.  You can make a foam taste like just about anything, if you infuse it with the correct flavor, then create a whipped emulsion of fat globules and air bubbles.  Delish!  

Powders are another standby of molecular gastronomy.  In fact, it was in the name of creating a powder that Lebovitz ended up with the aforementioned five gallon bucket of maltodextrin.  (Nutella powder, in case you were wondering.  And I'm sure it was delicious - how could it not be? - but I was left with the same question molecular gastronomy always raises for me: how is this better than just eating Nutella?)

"Glass" is a third item.  You take something delicious, then infuse it in a sugar film.  Glass is at the heart of the "bacon powder wrapped in pineapple glass" which Paul at Sweet and Sour Spectator spent three days creating.  I can't help but admire Paul for his stick-to-it-ive-ness if nothing else!  He had a much easier time securing the required maltodextrin, as well as something called "Pure-Cote B790."  But if I ever encountered a recipe that would require me to pour pineapple slime on my countertop and leave it there overnight, that would be the end of that particular recipe.

It used to be that when I thought about molecular gastronomy, I felt derision.  Now I feel admiration - bemused admiration, but admiration nevertheless.  What brave heights these pioneers strive for!  And the commitment shown by food bloggers - regular citizens like you and me - is nothing short of miraculous.

Why I Avoid The Expired Foods Grocery Store

Today I happened across an article on the BBC website about the thriving trade in out-of-date foods in Britain:

A)    The sell-by and best-before dates are only general indicators.  It's not like the food turns into poison a week after the date printed on the label.


B)    We waste a terrible amount of food.  Without these second chance retailers, the food they sell would otherwise be sent to the dump.  Here in the States at least, food banks do not take past-date foods as a safety (and CYA) precaution.


C)    Save a ton of money!

For a long time, I was prejudiced against the outlet stores.  Let's be honest; they are dismal places to shop.  The aisles are narrow, the organization is chaotic, the lighting is poor, and there's always a baby crying.  But hey, that's how they keep prices down.

After I started shopping at the discount store, I also started comparing my receipts.  Week by week, my receipts for the discount store were about half the cost of the equivalent groceries at Safeway.  Considering the amount you spend on food per month, you can't afford NOT to save 50% on your groceries, regardless of your income.  Leaving money on the table, I thought at the time, was just ridiculous.

Then things started to go wrong.  In hindsight, the phrase that haunts me is "Penny wise, pound foolish."

The first problem was a package of bacon.  (This was before I went vegetarian, obviously.)  I opened it the day after I bought it.  Two days later (three days after purchase) I opened it to pull out a slice, and the smell was… horrific.  Absolutely rotten.  There was no questioning whether or not it was edible.  I threw it straight into the trash.

How old does bacon have to be, if it goes rotten three days after you open it?  I've had bacon open before for up to a week without any problems.  I resolved not to buy any more meats there.

A month later, I noticed a moth.  Then another.  Soon I was practically besieged by little fluttering moths.  Being a knitter, I feared the worst.  I was relieved to learn that they were "pantry moths," and they didn't want my wool - they were after my grains.

I spent an entire Saturday cleaning out my pantry, sorting my foods, throwing away anything that had been infested, and putting the rest into secure containers.  I spent about $30 on food storage containers, threw away about $50 in infested foodstuffs, and cursed the day I started shopping at the discount grocery store.  

Judging by the volume of infestation and moth damage, it all started with the package of Abuelita cocoa tablets I bought at the discount store.  Either that, or the bag of popcorn kernels, which I also bought at the discount store.  I then remembered having seen little moths fluttering around the store, but I didn't think anything about it at the time.

Now I know: moths at the grocery store: bad.  And past-date dry goods have sat around long enough to potentially harbor pantry moth infestations.  Those dates on the packages?  They're not the end of the world but… you can't avoid the fact that fresher food is fresher.

How To Make Green Bean Casserole, A Thanksgiving Favorite

Green bean casserole is one of those things that you either love or loathe.  It inspires strong feelings.  Personally I love it, but I can understand why people loathe it.  It's often made with canned green beans, which can turn to mush in the hands of an unskilled cook.  The crunchy onion topping can go soggy if the casserole is too wet.  And the casserole goo itself can be awfully… gooey.

I'm alone in my family, in liking green bean casserole.  I usually end up fixing it for myself at the holidays.  (And occasionally throughout the year, when I feel the need for some casserole-y goodness.)  Whenever I attend another family's Thanksgiving, I always keep an eye out for the possibility of green bean casserole.  

The best way to make a green bean casserole is to use fresh ingredients.  It takes only a little more work to make green bean casserole from scratch, and it is well worth the trouble.  There are three elements to green bean casserole:

1. Beans


Fresh green beans are usually available year round, although you may have to scour the produce section to find them.  At one grocery store I found them tucked in baskets in the refrigerated case alongside the other "weird produce" like kumquats and Serrano chilies.  At another grocery store they were only available pre-bagged, and the bags were stacked beside the cabbage (instead of with the other pre-bagged salads and vegetables up in front).  Think of it as a challenge.

If your beans have stems, chop them off.  Then chop the beans into lengths about two or three inches long.  Next, bring a pot of salted water to a boil, and simmer the beans for a few minutes.  Your goal is just to soften them a little, not to cook them all the way through.  Once they are a little fork tender, dump them into a colander, and run some cold water over them to stop the cooking.

2. Onions


I still like to use those crunchy onions from the can.  The cans go on sale during the holidays, and I buy extra to stockpile for the rest of the year.  

If you want to try something new, I recently tried Alton Brown's green bean casserole recipe, and it was fantastic!  He has you thin slice onions, bread them, then caramelize them in the oven.  My breading didn't stick well to the onions, but they were still delicious.

3. Sauce

The traditional green bean casserole calls for a can of cream of mushroom soup.  Try making your own sauce!  It's easy, and really delicious.  You will be making a basic roux, then adding chopped mushrooms.  (Alton Brown's recipe has you add a bit of nutmeg, too - I liked it!)

If you don't know how to make a roux, this is an excellent place to start.  A good roux is the key to unlocking so many recipes, including delicious casseroles!  To make a roux, you basically melt butter in a pan, then whisk in flour until it thickens and browns.  To make it a cream sauce, next add cream (half and half or heavy cream, your choice) and let it simmer for 5 or 6 minutes.  So easy, and surprisingly delicious!

Assemble your ingredients in a casserole dish, then bake at 350 for 15-20 minutes or until it bubbles.  Mm, I want to make another one tonight!

Fat Free Half and Half?!

Today at the grocery store I found myself staring into the dairy case with bewilderment.  I needed half and half for a recipe I planned to make.  But the dairy gods wanted me to choose: between half and half and  FAT FREE half and half.

In what kind of world does the phrase "fat free half and half" even make sense?  Not mine, surely, so I bought the regular half and half.  It was a fear-based dairy purchase.  Once I got home, I did some research on "fat free half and half."  

As it happens, my understanding of "half and half" is entirely correct.  According to the US Food and Drug Administration, "Half-and-half is the food consisting of a mixture of milk and cream which contains not less than 10.5 percent but less than 18 percent milkfat. It is pasteurized or ultra-pasteurized, and may be homogenized."

Legally, companies are allowed to use the "half and half" name, because they are clearly labeling it as "fat free."  Chemically, fat free half and half is skim milk with a ton of thickeners to provide that creamy weight and texture which buyers expect from half and half.  Corn syrup and carrageenan, mostly.

Can you use it?  Well, that depends.  Obviously a lot of people are, or it wouldn't be on the shelves.  If you want a guiltless treat for your morning coffee, then fat free half and half will do the trick.  Fat free half and half can also be substituted for any instance where regular half and half is only there to provide consistency.  However, the taste of fat free half and half is quite different from regular half and half, so be prepared to be able to tell the difference between them.

For example, fat free half and half is an excellent choice for making non-acidic soups such as potato soup.  It gives the soup the right consistency and volume of liquid, without adding all the fat.  (Regular half and half has almost 30 grams of fat per cup.)  Ideally you would want to use it in a strongly flavored soup, to help blur the unusual taste of the fat free half and half.  

What you don't want to do is substitute fat free half and half in recipes where the fat content is the reason for including half and half in the first place.  Ice cream, for example, is not the place to experiment.  There are plenty of specifically fat free ice cream recipes (most of them add more egg yolks, as a stabilizer to help balance out the lack of fat).  

Recipes with high acidity, such as tomato soup, also do not perform well with fat free half and half as a substitute.  The high acidity naturally curdles the milk, which is a problem that the extra cream in half and half helps to prevent.  I ran across a lot of mentions of acidic recipes having curdled fat free half and half, and isn't that a shame!

Regular half and half has almost 30 grams of fat per cup, and if you use it very often, then switching to the fat free version might not be a bad idea.  Just be careful not to use it in anything acidic, and be prepared for unusual results if you're cooking "off the map."

Eat That Halloween Pumpkin!

Now that Halloween has passed and we're headed straight for the holidays, cheap or free pumpkins litter the ground.  Last night at the grocery store they were literally giving away pumpkins for free on your way out the store!  I couldn't pass that up, so I ended up hauling home a medium sized pumpkin, thinking that it was a squash, so surely you can eat it, right?

Right!

The kind of pumpkin you carve at Halloween is not exactly the same kind of pumpkin that comes in a can to be used in pies.  Those would be "pie pumpkins" or "sugar pumpkins."  Carving pumpkins are a winter squash, a Cucurbita cultivar just like all the other winter squashes in that big bin at the grocery store.

Scrub any residual dirt off the skin of the pumpkin - since they are not sold to be eaten, pumpkins tend to be dirtier than other produce!  Cut off the top, scoop out the guts (save the seeds to roast!), then carve the meat into pieces about three or four inches square.

At this point, you can cook the meat just as you would any other squash.  I like to roast squash in the oven with olive oil and salt for about an hour at 350 degrees.  If you want a sweeter side dish, you can use brown sugar and cinnamon instead of salt, and add a pat of butter before serving.

To use your pumpkin for bread, pie, or soup, it will need to be pureed.  To make a puree, first cook the meat until it is soft to the touch.  You can do this by simmering it in a pot of water, or by roasting it in the oven.  If you choose boiling, be sure the chunks are completely submerged.  If you roast it, use high heat (I cooked mine at 475 degrees) and add about a quarter inch of water to the bottom of the roasting pan to keep the meat from drying out.

Once it has been cooked and cooled to a safe temperature, you can peel off the rind.  This should be fairly easy, now that the meat is soft from cooking.  I like to scrape the inside of the rind with a spoon, to make sure I'm getting everything!  

Mash the meat into a puree with a fork, or use a food processor if you have one.  Remember to adjust your recipe's ingredients to account for the consistency of your puree, and add extra liquids if necessary.  And because this isn't as sweet as a pie pumpkin, you will want to add a bit of extra sugar if you are making a pie.  

Bonus Points: Roasting Pumpkin Seeds

The easiest way to separate the seeds is to plunge the whole mess into a big bowl of water.  The water makes it easy to slide the seeds out of the slimy guts.

I like my pumpkin seeds really crispy, so once I have rinsed off all the guts, I spread them out to dry for a few days.  I like them simple, so I just toss them with some olive oil and sea salt, and roast them at 325 degrees for 25 minutes or until golden and crispy, stirring after 10 minutes.

National Peanut Butter Lovers Month

Lovers of sticky mouth roofs and jelly, unite! November is National Peanut Butter Lover’s Month.

Peanut butter has always been one of my favorite “comfort foods.” My grandmother used to keep a jar by her bed—she was a total peanut butter fiend—and she would eat a tablespoon every evening while she watched television or did a crossword puzzle. I would always sneak up the stairs—we lived in the downstairs apartment—and crawl in bed with her, rustling the newspaper as I stole a nibble of peanut butter, too.

Peanut butter is also a decent health food, as long as it’s not indulged in too often or too much. Two tablespoons have nearly two hundred calories, making it pretty heavy in the energy department; that said, it’s also full of protein and contains fiber, which can also make you feel full, saving you from eating a ton of calories later.

According to Nancy Clark, RD, peanut butter has other benefits as well. It’s considered a great food for athletes, as well as for the heart. A peanut butter sandwich, she maintains, is healthier than anything you’re going to get from the drive thru window. It’s also a source of healthy fats and some vitamins and minerals.

Though it has its haters, peanut butter is a favorite food of many Americans. It’s found in about 75% of American households and can be used in everything from breakfast toast to peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for lunch—and even peanut butter cookies in between.

This month, celebrate your love of peanut butter by:

Making peanut butter cookies with your kids. Show them how easy it is to make those little fork designs on the top.

Eating some and being grateful you aren’t allergic to peanuts.

Trying different varieties, from creamy to crunchy go mixed goober varieties.

Making a new peanut butter recipe. Try peanut butter dip, slaw, cake, soup, muffins, pasta and any of these other recipes.

Learning about peanut butter and its history. Did you know that Kellogg (yes, the cereal guy with all the kids) is credited with the first peanut butter making process, when the food was called “nut meal”? Peanut butter goes far further back then that, however; peanuts were crushed and used in early forms of peanut butter in both ancient China as well as in Africa long before the peanut butter we know today was even thought of.

5 Weird Ways To Cook Food

Sure, you could be boring and cook your dinner in an OVEN or over a GRILL.  But where's the fun in that?  Check out these other clever ideas for cookery!

1.    Trout A La Compost Heap

Well, blogger Tim Doherty calls it a "compost heap" but I think most of us would call it a "manure pile."  When I think "compost heap" I think "vegetable trimmings and coffee grounds," you know?

At any rate, he provides very detailed instructions for cooking Trout de Compost.  This involves getting the combustion inside the compost heap cranking to between 140 and 160 degrees, and cooking the trout for 18 hours. 

Which may be longer than many people are willing to wait for a trout dinner, but it's not like you have to sit there beside the compost heap the entire time!

2.    Engine Block Oven

The summer after I graduated from high school in Alaska, I was preparing to drive the Alcan highway down to the Lower 48 for college.  For some reason I was barraged with helpful instructions on how to cook things in my car's engine compartment. 

Something about the combination of the long drive and the wilderness setting spurred people to remind me that an engine block is really hot!  And you can make stew in there!

This art hit its peak with the cookbook Manifold Destiny, which details recipes, as well as drive times.

3.    Dashboard Oven

We Americans love our cars.  Almost as much as we love our cookies.  If you have ever grimaced as you slipped into your car which had been baking in the parking lot on a hot midsummer day and thought, "I wonder if I could bake cookies on the dashboard?"  Be advised that the answer is: Yes.

Some caveats: cookie dough contains raw egg, so use a cooking thermometer to be sure you're in the safe zone.  Baking Bites blogger Nicole Weston did some tests, and found that the outside temperature needs to be over 100 degrees, at which point it was 180 degrees inside her car. 

Even so, it took approximately 2 ½ hours for the cookies to bake.  So this isn't the technique for people in a rush!  


4.    With Lime Juice

In ceviche, seafood is marinated in a citrus juice (usually lemon or lime juice).  Technically this "pickles" instead of "cooking" the meat, but the effect is the same - its texture changes, and it is rendered safe to eat.

I can't help but point out that ceviche is largely restricted to things that don't need much cooking to begin with.  Heck, a lot of people just eat seafood raw.  In other words, I have yet to run across beef ceviche!  

5.    In Vacuum

If you laugh at the threat of botulism, try cooking your meats sous-vide.  This technique was developed by fancy-pants chefs to create an incredibly tender cut of meat by cooking it very slowly, at a very low temperature.  

To cook something sous-vide, put it inside a Ziplock bag and squeeze out all the air.  Then submerge it in water, and heat the water slowly to well below the boiling point.  And wait!  You can cook something sous-vide for up to 24 hours, at which point the meat can practically be eaten with a  spoon, or so I have heard.

Food Memories

Food, at its best, is not just sustenance or indulgence. It is a social unifier and a powerful focus for our memories. When we talk about loved ones from our pasts, we often mention the dishes for which they were known or the funny stories of their presence at the dinner table. Today, I would like to share my memories of my grandmother by visiting a few of the foods she so lovingly prepared.

My grandmother, a born and bred Texan, married a Sicilian carpenter with an appetite for fresh pasta. Studying under her mother-in-law, my grandmother learned how to make a proper, old-world spaghetti dinner from scratch and several generations later we still reaped the benefits. There is truly nothing in the world like fresh, hand-made pasta. It is never crunchy because it never had a chance to dry before it went in the pot, but also never gummy as long as the cook keeps an eye on it and doesn't let it boil too long. Fresh pasta holds onto sauce as if the two were never separate and it cuts without resistance so eating it is never sloppy. When my mother got engaged to my father, my grandmother taught him how to make this pasta as a way to welcome him into the family.

And the sauce itself? If your tomato sauce has spent less than half the day simmering on the stove, it isn't real tomato sauce. My grandmother's rendition was a deep red marinara with a decidedly herbal tone and only a hint of sweetness. She always served red pepper flakes on the side for those who wanted it extra spicy. For special occasions she would also include a variety of fresh meats in a separate container, from hot Italian sausage to extra-slow-stewed chicken and her famous meatballs. Such a meal graced our table on New Year's Eve, engagement parties and birthdays for decades.

While my mother has been the undisputed baking expert in the family for quite a long time now (perfect cheesecake, anyone?), my grandmother knew her way around a cookie like no one else. When it comes to cookies, I'm unabashedly traditional. Sure, I can appreciate the intrigue of a trendy concoction like a ginger and cayenne tea biscuit, but any tall-hat chef can put one of those together and coast on the novelty. It takes a sense of art older than the printed word to make a chocolate chip cookie taste the way it ought to. My grandmother's rendition was, without hyperbole, flawless. They were golden brown, crispy but not crumbly and there was chocolate in every single bite. As a small child, every visit to my grandparents' house began with an investigation of the cookie jar and I cannot recall a time when it wasn't full at the outset, or empty by the end.

I'm sure everyone has that person in his or her past who made food into something special. It's a combination of the objective quality of the food and the emotions attached to it that make it all so wonderful. I welcome all of you readers to share your own food memories in our comments section.

Happy eating.

45 Crazy DIY Recipes

This article at Discovery Channel's Planet Green website caught my eye.  They list "45 food items people regularly buy that they could make at home: healthier, cheaper, and tastier."  This in a nutshell has been my mandate for the last year or so, and I have bookmarked the article accordingly!

Until I read this article, I had no idea that you could make your own ketchup.  I had heard that you could make your own mayonnaise - but I had also heard that it was really hard!  Apparently you really need an electric blender to whisk it properly.  And baking soda - you can make your own baking soda?  That is crazy!  Fortunately I bought a can of baking soda in 1998, and since I have used only 1/10th of the can (even though I bake frequently) I guess that can is a lifetime's supply.

I have actually tried several items on this list already, so I thought I would go through them with you.

Vanilla extract - okay, having said that?  I haven't actually tried this.  I was going to, but then I saw the price of vanilla beans at the store, and coupled with the price of vodka, I crunched some numbers and realized it was going to be cheaper to just buy it pre-made.  

I have heard that homemade vanilla extract tastes and smells a billion times better than store-bought, so I would definitely like to try making my own some day.  But let's not pretend that it will be healthier or cheaper.

(As a side note: I'm not sure how long I could hold out before just drinking the vanilla flavored vodka!  Can you imagine how awesome it would taste with Coke?  Or even just chilled?)

Jam- they specify grape jelly, but my part of the world (the Skagit Valley in Washington State) is famous for growing berries.  Last year I must have put up four gallons of raspberry, blackberry, blueberry, and tayberry jam.  Enough jam to last me quite some time, I can assure you!

I had always heard that jelly and jam was hard.  But if you're okay with making "freezer jam" which has to be stored in the freezer, it couldn't be easier!  You hardly need pectin - just cook down the berries, and bang them in a jar.  And it's oh so good!  Not sure on the cost effectiveness, although I was able to get "canning special" flats from the farmers market.

Dill Pickles - yes, a thousand times, yes!  You can make these all year round, and they are SO delicious.  And pickled vegetables are ridiculously expensive!  My biggest hint for pickles is to blanch the vegetables first, if you're using something "sturdy" like cauliflower or green beans.

French Dressing - again, why stop there?  I learned how to make my own dressing a few years ago, and never looked back.  Mix 1 T balsamic or red wine vinegar, 5 T olive oil (the best you can afford), and a splotch of Dijon mustard.  Add minced garlic to taste, and stir well.  The mustard makes it tangy, and helps emulsify it so it doesn't separate.

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