I've posted elsewhere about high quality chocolate Easter candy. This post isn't nearly as concerned about quality, as it is about quantity. Now, while I'm an admitted chocolate snob, there's definitely a time and a place for your generic sugar high, and right now when the stores are loaded with Easter candy, your average blogger deserves a trip down the memory lane sugar high. In the interests of starting off the less experienced on an easy fix, I'll begin with the gateway drug candy, then move on to the hardcore stuff. The gateway drug is, of course, Cadbury's Mini Eggs. These are actually made of pretty good chocolate, in the form of a small marble-sized solid chocolate egg, in your choice of milk or dark chocolate, covered with a thin crunchy sugar shell. The shell gives you a quick buzz; the chocolate gets you addicted. These compulsively-consumable little balls of milk chocolate provide instant, easy, economical satisfaction in a candy-coated shell. Think M&Ms, only bigger and with even more chocolaty goodness.
Once you've mastered the mini-eggs, there are a couple of good options for chocolate sugar-buzz escalation. Most people quickly move up the chain to either the Crème eggs, or the Caramel eggs. These are roughly the size of a small chicken egg, made of hollow chocolate and filled with an incredibly sweet fondant filling, or a gooey thick caramel. Either of them provides a quick sugar boost and a pretty substantial calorie hit. Now some of us, including yours truly, have certain issues with the Crème eggs because they are very much designed to mimic a real egg, with the creme filling consisting of a white creme with a yellow "yolk" center. A single egg, according to the official nutritional breakdown, has 150 calories. A single Caramel filled egg has 170 calories, 80 of 'em from fat. What's not to love there? Now here's the surprising part; a "single serving" of the Cadbury's Mini Eggs (which, by the way, Cadbury thinks is a mere twelve eggs—please, let's try to be realistic? That's half a serving!) is 190 calories, 70 from fat.
Now, I know, you're looking at that and thinking "OK, tasty, but not a balanced diet." Fear not; I have that covered. That's why every blogger's Easter basket should include Jordan Almonds, sometimes called "sugared almonds." A nice, plump, roasted almond with a thin sugar shell, usually in pastel colors. It's sugar, it's nice and crunchy, and almonds are full of protein. A serving (a measly 15 pieces sugar-covered almonds) contains 180 calories, but also provides 3.0 grams of protein!
But wait! I have more nutritional goodness masquerading as high-sucrose Easter candy; I offer up for your gustatory attention Hershey's Robin Eggs. These are crisp little balls of malted milk covered with chocolate, at which point you might be thinking of Hershey's Whoppers, but Robin Eggs are then covered with a thin brightly colored sugar shell, slightly speckled to look like an egg. These are like crack for those of us susceptible to a sugar-high, though they are also sources of calcium. These were one of my very very favorites as a child, though I always tried to swap the pink ones because pink candy is nasty. Trust me on this.
Now then, let's not forget the rest of the required elements of any balanced sugar-buzz; man can't live by chocolate and its derivatives, alone; faux-fruits and vegetables are also important, and no Easter basket is complete without Jellybeans. If you look, you can find Jelly Belly beans; if you can't find them at your local chain, try Trader Joes, or an up-market grocery store. Jelly Belly beans are worth the extra effort. Besides, think of the nutrition of all those fruit flavors! You can even get jalapeño flavored jellybeans, which sound sort of gruesome but are oddly consumable.
That brings us to that ultimate Easter-candy buzz-provider, to top off your sugar experience; Peeps. Peeps are the ubiquitous Easter candy, made of sugar, and marshmallow, or, essentially, sugar and sugar. Initially only available as bright yellow chicks, they have since expanded so that now you can find the chicks in yellow, pink, green, blue, lavender and orange. Moreover, the chicks have been joined by bunnies, available in yellow, pink, lavender, blue and green. Each chick has 35 calories, and 0 grams of fat. Personally, of course, I don't actually eat Peeps; sometimes it's more fun to play with your food. Should you decide, however, to consume your peeps with glee, I can only advise care. More than twelve at a sitting are only recommended for professionals on a closed course.
Lest you think I'm just taunting you with gustatory delights you can't have, I want you to know that I have personally verified that all of these are currently available at local grocery stores and chain drugstores, and usually, a rock-bottom prices. And it that isn't enough to lure you out of the dark to make a quick little supply run right now, I want you to think about how you're helping the economy and stabilizing the nation's tax base by buying Easter crack candy. I'll close by letting you watch one of the best commercials ever; Cadbury's Clucking Bunny.